Derrida and his Fear of Writing

It's comforting to know that even professional writers experience a certain fear of writing. To me, Derrida seems extremely confident and self-aware. He knows the true power of language and writing and knows that what he says and writes will be taken very seriously. With that power, as with all power, comes a responsibility. This responsibility is what motivates this fear, or tentativeness, to begin writing, at least for me. I am responsible for creating a work that is respected by others, one that others can use for their own benefit.

I think that Derrida's fear is rooted in a similar circumstance. It seems to me that because he realizes this great responsibility, he is scared that he might write something, especially a particularly strong and opinionated piece, that will cause harm to a reader. He does not want to do this; he just wants to make his point. Because this harm or insult is always a possible outcome, however, Derrida always has a certain trepidation when it comes to his writing. I admire Derrida though because he overcomes these potential setbacks. He realizes that what he thinks is valuable and that it must be said. It was interesting to hear that when he was not writing he also had a certain hesitation, this time stemming from being overwhelmed with thoughts that he feels he must somehow express.

As for me, I notice that I am often not confident in what I write, and this goes back to my fear of that responsibility. I do not want to be wrong in my thoughts or opinions. If I am wrong, my credibility as a writer will be destroyed and I will no longer be entrusted with this responsibility. Even in this blog entry I notice that many sentences begin with, or at least contain somewhere, the phrases "I think" or "in my opinion." I need to destroy this fear of being wrong and take on my responsibility wholeheartedly.